Oh, lord, my god. I brought this on myself. lol. Just for the record, I broke up with my boyfriend the week of Thanksgiving. Seems to be a pattern I'm getting into lol. I broke up with him because he had some problematic personal issues. They were making him miserable, me miserable, and according to my mother, everyone else that had to put up with me miserable. Sorry, I do wear my heart on my sleeve. He made both of our lives unnecessarily difficult with his insecurity. I do still care about him but I'm still not sure that he and I can ever BE again. Now the break up was my idea. I did it. And he is not mad at me. Which is nice for a change. He does want to get back together. But to repeat myself, looking back, I don't know if we should be together again. Yet, for the first time, I left someone who I did not want to leave 100%, and I do still have some sort of care for them.
So, since I left my last boyfriend, my mother decided that she was going to force me to bow to her will. We both know a guy, David, who we hang out with at the football games. He is somewhere between our ages so Mom thinks that he is the perfect age for me. Which, he may be. I do prefer older men. However, perhaps because my mother is forcing me to see this guy, or perhaps I just can't feel for him, I am not so gung-ho about it. He is not the type of guy I have ever been attracted to or dated. Yet I am willing and have tried to put that aside because ... let's just say that what I have been doing, hasn't been working. But, as nice and sweet and Christian as this guys is ...... it ain't werkin lol. I'm not trying to blow my own whistle, trust me, but he is a bit obsessive. The first time he and I hung out together (with supervision mind you), he called me for 2 weeks - every day - and asked to see me that day. He texts me everyday and tells me how much he thinks about me. He texts my mom and they talk about me and he tells her how much he likes me. Which, it might sound cute, but it's not. It's too much. It's oppressive and smothering. And slightly disturbing. So, I tolerate him when I have to because my mother told me I have to be nice to him since he is her friend too.
So, I have been enjoying my freedom. Sadly it does seem like freedom because there is not always someone hovering on the phone or someone I had to talk to when I wasn't in the mood. Which is quite often. Oh but the physical loneliness set in soon. So lately I have been daydreaming about meeting the semi-perfect man who has the body of a gladiator and be smart like McGhee and be mind blowing in bed. See, I don't want much lol. There is a guy who I have had a crush on for quite some time, but I never fantasize about men I know. lol. Moving on .....
Tonight, I received a text from a number I didn't know. I don't usually respond well to wrong numbers or people texting me from numbers I don't know. Turns out, it's one of my exes. From about 2 years ago. IF I can call him an ex. Because for him, he never really considered us a "couple." I didn't realize that at first, although I am pretty sure he wasn't seeing anyone else either nor sleeping with anyone else nor talking to anyone else - about anything, at all. He said that he wasn't ready for that. However, tonight he told me that he loved me, missed me, and wanted to be with me for real, no half ass bullshit. Interesting. Then he sortta popped my balloon when he told me he was out about town and wanted to come over. However, he didn't throw a fit when he I told him no, but maybe this weekend. Even though he offered to let me stay the night. Perhaps he really hasn't changed ..............
But I just thought it was hilarious. I have guys throwing themselves at me, for gods know what reason, and I'm not sure that I want any of them. Isn't that just what I get? Perhaps I should have been more specific. But, what do you guys think? Should I give any of them the time of day or none of them. I'm almost afraid of the answers.
Maybe you should give your most recent ex some time to work through his problems. If you really do have feelings for him, maybe you should keep the lines of communication open and see him occasionally until things smooth out.
ReplyDeleteAs far as the friend of yours and your mom's...I wouldn't go there at all if he that close to your mom. She will know ALL your business, not good at all. RETREAT IMMEDIATELY.
The other ex, back away completely. Sounds like all he was after before was a booty call girl, and now he wants to pick that right back up where he left off before. Don't fall for it. Unless all you want is a booty call too, then you can let him think he is tricking you, LOL. But seriously, I wouldn't give him the time of day.
Oh, it's SOOOO awful to be a woman. You get penises thrown at you since the second you start developing boobs. You already know how i think about the shut-in. What you've said about him already has me thinking 'weirdo' and potential 'problem'. I can only guess that there are things about him you haven't said yet. I'm the last one that should be giving relationship advice, but that's a mess you don't need.
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